First time in history, student asks stupid question. Contradicting the age old philosophy “there’s no such thing as a stupid question,” local High Schooler Jaymes Floorboy, just astounded teachers and pupils alike by asking the world’s first ever stupid question. The student, a 12th grader attending Jontieroa High School, had the entire school on lockdown following his question in US History class, deemed to be the first stupid question in all recorded history. A reporter from the Sewer was able to snatch a brief interview with the principle of the school, who purportedly stated “We’re very proud of James! Here at Jontieroa, we encourage students to think outside the box, even when that box is coated in snot-covered crayon shavings and half-eaten glue. From this day forward,” the Principle said “today will be a schoolwide holiday, and we shall have a moment of silence to celebrate this glorious occasion.” The principle was unable to answer any more questions, stating that he was too busy preparing for the Regents exams next week; exams Jaymes is expected to perform remarkably on. Obama and Putin spend romantic weekend together after accidental booking of couples retreat. An error last weekend led to the booking of a couples weekend for world leaders Barack Obama and Vladimir Putin. The two planned to focus on increasing diplomatic relations between the US and Russia in coming months and years. “The weekend was lovely,” a relaxed and lackadaisical Obama told reporters.

http://onteorasewer.tumblr.com/post/41011240373/white-family-still-perplexed-by-what-to-call#_=_

GOP to Appeal to Hispanic Voters with New Candidate After a tough loss to Obama last year, Republicans are changing their game plan for the 2016 election. Focusing on the lackluster support by hispanic voters, the GOP announced Enrique Miguel Honduras as the most likely candidate for the next election cycle. With a Mexican immigrant on the ballot, the party hopes to gain increased support from hispanic voters. Opposition on the left has attacked Mr. Honduras for his lack of political experience. Speaking on behalf of the candidate, GOP spokesperson Connor Whitman Jr. told the Sewer, “Señor Honduras is a god fearing family man, something every American can relate to.” When asked to expand on his platform, Mr. Honduras glanced nervously at Whitman and told us, “no comment.”

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Yet there’s no denying this fact: When leaders focus on what’s vital in their business, they’re more apt to get results and sustain success. In the spirit of recognizing and celebrating this relevant truth, Management Action Programs (MAP) is proud to announce the recipients of its 12th Annual Presidential Awards. The MAP Presidential Award calls out the excellence of leaders who demonstrate extraordinary dedication to effectively leading themselves, their teams and their organization. Yet the award also spotlights their team’s success in using the MAP Management System™ to achieve breakthrough results. A proven business-management solution, the MAP System leverages MAP’s customized consulting and an accountability process to execute Vital Factors® Goals. This process is the critical, differentiating factor that’s enabling these organizations’ achievement. It’s also giving these organizations a significant marketplace edge in providing the strategies to sustain Gordontheplumber.com Sewer Rodding the healthy business-management habits of their disciplined leaders . “These are impressive organizations,” says John Manning, president of MAP, the Los Angeles-based firm that has helped 170,000 leaders in more than 15,000 organizations over the past 50+ years. “They’ve worked hard to embrace and uphold structured accountability in everything they do.

http://www.thesunnyplumber.com/blog/community-involvement/management-action-programs-map-announces-12th-annual-presidential-award-recipients/

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